As I sit here today recording audio for past posts and poems, I have to pause for a moment. I came to a point in the poetry section that as I read a certain poem, I was moved to tears. I had forgotten the weight of this poem, I had only read it out loud to myself once or twice as I wrote it then left it aside and moved on. I do this with almost all of my poetry.
Today though, while playing back this poem I had just recorded, I cried! It brought back so many memories of getting bullied in school. Of never fitting in at any place I went. At being different and ashamed of those differences. It was like reliving that pain all over again.
In the midst of all of these painful memories, I was also lifted up to a higher place. I was reminded that yes the pain was significant and cut deep, but I gained strength through it. I gained courage because even though it seemed life had come to a crashing halt, I stood up again. I gained self-awareness to understand my value so I would never let anyone push me around again or bully me. I gained the knowledge needed to never allow myself to act in such a way towards others. I gained acceptance of others for their unique qualities. Most of all, through terror and torment, I learned LOVE, what it was like to love and what it was like not to have love.
These are valuable lessons to learn. I am thankful to have this outlook. To created and become the good from the bad. What is this poem that sparked all of this you might ask? It is titled, I Will Stand Up Again, and can be found by clicking the title. This one is worth listening to the audio as you read.